Dustie Bear
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« on: May 10, 2011, 10:21:08 pm » |
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ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?
COSTELLO: Thanks. I'm setting up an office in my den, and I'm thinking about buying a computer. ABBOTT: Mac?
COSTELLO: No, the name's Lou. ABBOTT: Your computer?
COSTELLO: I don't own a computer. I want to buy one. ABBOTT: Mac?
COSTELLO: I told you, my name's Lou. ABBOTT: What about Windows?
COSTELLO: Why? Will it get stuffy in here? ABBOTT: Do you want a computer with Windows?
COSTELLO: I don't know. What will I see when I look in the windows? ABBOTT: Wallpaper.
COSTELLO: Never mind the windows. I need a computer and software. ABBOTT: Software for Windows?
COSTELLO: No. On the computer! I need something I can use to write proposals, track expenses and run my business. What ave you got? ABBOTT: Office.
COSTELLO: Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend anything? ABBOTT: I just did.
COSTELLO: You just did what? ABBOTT: Recommend something.
COSTELLO: You recommended something? ABBOTT: Yes.
COSTELLO: For my office? ABBOTT: Yes
COSTELLO: OK, what did you recommend for my office? ABBOTT: Office.
COSTELLO: Yes, for my office! ABBOTT: I recommend Office with Windows.
COSTELLO: I already have an office and it has windows! OK, let's just say, I'm sitting at my computer and I want to type a proposal. What do I need? ABBOTT: Word.
COSTELLO: What word? ABBOTT: Word in Office.
COSTELLO: The only word in office is office. ABBOTT: The Word in Office for Windows.
COSTELLO: Which word in office for windows? ABBOTT: The Word you get when you click the blue "W."
COSTELLO: I'm going to click your blue w if you don't start with some straight answers. OK, forget that. Can I watch movies on the Internet? ABBOTT: Yes, you want Real One.
COSTELLO: Maybe a real one, maybe a cartoon. What I watch is none of your business. Just tell me what I need! ABBOTT: Real One.
COSTELLO: If it's a long movie I also want to see reel 2, 3 & 4. Can I watch them? ABBOTT: Of course.
COSTELLO: Great, with what? ABBOTT: Real One.
COSTELLO: OK, I'm at my computer and I want to watch a movie. What do I do? ABBOTT: You click the blue "one."
COSTELLO: I click the blue one what? ABBOTT: The blue 1.
COSTELLO: Is that different from the blue "w"? ABBOTT: The blue 1 is Real One and the blue "w" is Word.
COSTELLO: What word? ABBOTT: The Word in Office for Windows.
COSTELLO: But there's three words in office for windows! ABBOTT: No, just one. But it's the most popular Word in the world!
COSTELLO: It is? ABBOTT: Yes, but to be fair, there aren't many other Words left. It pretty much wiped out all the other Words out there.
COSTELLO: And that word is real one? ABBOTT: Real One has nothing to do with Word. Real One isn't even part of Office.
COSTELLO: Stop! Don't start that again. What about financial bookkeeping, do you have anything I can track my money with? ABBOTT: Money.
COSTELLO: That's right. What do you have? ABBOTT: Money.
COSTELLO: I need money to track my money? ABBOTT: It comes bundled with your computer.
COSTELLO: What's bundled to my computer? ABBOTT: Money
COSTELLO: Money comes with my computer? ABBOTT: Yes. No extra charge.
COSTELLO: I get a bundle of money with my computer? How much? ABBOTT: One copy
COSTELLO: Isn't it illegal to copy money? ABBOTT: Microsoft gave us a license to copy Money.
COSTELLO: They can give you a license to copy money? ABBOTT: Why not, they own it.
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OlDosLover
Guest
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« Reply #1 on: May 11, 2011, 02:19:52 am » |
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Hi all, Very apt and funny Dustie. Good on ya mate. OlDosLover.
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GarrisonRicketson
Admin
Administrator
Hero Member
Posts: 583
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« Reply #2 on: May 12, 2011, 11:49:24 pm » |
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Arr!Arr!Arr! ( five stars) I like that,it really did get me laugheing,.. thanks Dusty from Garry
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Pete
Newbie
Posts: 7
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« Reply #3 on: May 13, 2011, 12:22:04 am » |
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So who's on first?
Microsoft has a funny way with names and slogans. They gave up on "A world without walls." That was probably because qbguy started posting... "In a world without walls... who the hell needs Windows?"
Good stuff, funny.
Pete
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OlDosLover
Guest
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« Reply #4 on: May 13, 2011, 02:21:47 am » |
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Hi all, Howdy Pete. Nice to see you over on your neighbours spread. We got some nice and wide pastures here but we got NO bad guys! We do have two kick ass sherrif's though. Welcome to the range fella. Glad to be riding alongside of you. OlDGunSlingerThatDidAnEnglishCourseToConfuseBadGuysWithGoodSpokenAndReasonableEnglish.
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Pete
Newbie
Posts: 7
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« Reply #5 on: May 13, 2011, 12:20:12 pm » |
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Only two sherrifs? How about a possy? There's a joke there, but I wouldn't want to upset the two sherrifs.
And did you know that famers in the "Old West" were called "Sod Busters?" There's a joke there, too, probably has something in common with the expression riding "tall in the saddle," but I digress... Oops, there's a couple of dudes wearing shiney stars ah ridin' my way, gotta go!
Pecos Pete
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